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the red devil strikes again

My Second Battle with Chemotherapy They say what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. But sometimes, it feels like the journey to strength comes with a hefty toll. Facing the “Red Devil” a second time, I was prepared for some of the more notorious side effects—hair loss being the most talked about—but I wasn’t quite prepared for the onslaught of additional challenges it would throw my way. As the clock ticked past midnight, signaling the dawn of a new day, I found myself wide awake, grappling with the weight of a familiar foe. This is my second time undergoing chemotherapy, and the dread of the "Red Devil" has once again become a part of my reality. For those fortunate enough to be unfamiliar, the "Red Devil" is a nickname given to the chemotherapy drug Doxorubicin, known for its potent and aggressive nature. Back in 2013, the first time I faced chemotherapy, I was filled with a mix of fear and hope. I clung to the belief that the treatment would work, that the side...
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christmas cheer and chemo chairs

Picture this: It's Christmas morning, but instead of unwrapping presents by the tree, I'm unwrapping IV lines in a cozy chemo chair. Talk about a plot twist, right? A Holiday Like No Other The hospital was eerily quiet, the usual hustle and bustle replaced with a calm serenity. The nurses, bless their festive hearts, were decked out in Santa hats and reindeer antlers, spreading cheer even as they administered my final doses of my previous month's partners in crime: Taxol and Carboplatin. Soon, I'll be enduring the Red Devil, a Chapter I am all too familiar with - yikes. The Gift of Resilience As I settled in for my last Taxol and Carboplatin treatment, I couldn't help but think how surreal it all felt. I decided to embrace the uniqueness of the moment. After all, what better time than Christmas and New Years to start a journey of hope and healing with my switching between my chemo companions? Deck the Halls with Humor The cancer center had turned the place into a mi...

let's go chemo

So, I hopped into my Halloween Bunny outfit to celebrate the October 31st holiday in treatment. I did my best to put on the fun face and bring humor to those around me.  Yet, I couldn't help but think - here I am again, back in the chair, feeling the cold rush of the Taxol/Carbo coursing through my veins. The familiar metallic taste in my mouth, the waves of nausea, and the crushing fatigue remind me of the battle scars from my first round of chemo. It's a harsh reality check that no matter how strong I was the first time, this second bout won't be any easier. The November treatments shift and the physical toll is immense, but it's the emotional and mental strain that truly takes its toll. The constant rollercoaster that leaves me feeling drained. The hair loss, the weight fluctuations, and the overall sense of feeling unwell are relentless reminders of the war being waged inside my body. Guess what else the "Red Devil" chemo can do? It can sometimes cause fac...

so long texas...

For those just joining in, my husband and I recently found ourselves at MD Anderson, speaking with a second opinions for my new cancer diagnosis and treatment plan. I just want to confirm my current treatment plan. Today we got to meet with the radiation oncologist. After examining my scans, she reassured me that, once again, my health escapades hadn't taken a turn for the unexpected. I was right on track, and she was also telling me exactly what other doctors had said. The biggest difference for me this time is that I am getting radiation to the left breast, which means there are a few more things involved since it is close to the heart. Radiation for Those Who Want a Brief Explanation 1. Before starting the actual treatment, a simulation session is conducted. This involves imaging scans (like CT or MRI) to precisely map the area that needs treatment. Some places add small tattoos or small temporary marks with sharpies and a circular clear tape placed on your skin to ensure accura...

another day, another mystery

After the amount of things accomplished on Wednesday, I was exhausted on Thursday. Today, I undertook the appointments with a mixture of apprehension, frustration, and hope. The stakes are always high and every consultation feels like navigating a labyrinth, especially when you are hoping for answers that you can't find. This day was no different. My appointment with the Surgical Oncologist was pivotal. We wanted answers, clarity, and a way forward. Surgical Oncologist The consultation began with a deep dive into my medical history and recent scans. The surgical oncologist’s words resonated in the sterile room, “Without a primary tumor, there’s no need for a mastectomy. It’s optional.” "We aren't sure where it started." The news was both a relief and a source of confusion. How could the cancer exist without a primary source? We knew it had to come from somewhere. Despite their best efforts, all the many doctors, biopsies, prods, and pokes on me had left us unable to l...

my longest hardest day yet

Get ready boys and girls... today is a doozy. And a long post too! But before we begin on one of the toughest days I've ever done, let's recap. Mon: Irritating Onc day where I was not told about suspicious fluid around lung/heart in time to get a biopsy & I got contradicting info from his NP the week before.  Tues: Spending the morning getting Immunotherapy and 2 Chemotherapies before going straight to the airport to fly to Houston and enduring long rental car lines and afternoon heavy traffic. A few more checks off this weeks list... a few more to go: Now back to my Wednesday... the Humpday I would like to forget! So, after 8 hours of cancer treatment, flying, and travel in congested Houston the day before, I didn't have much rest because we had to start Wednesday early. My husband and I decided to walk to the medical center since our hotel was close. However, it was not necessarily the easiest or closest walk - tons of traffic, intersections, and some strange indivi...